italiafile

So it's been a month... I blame parla.it, French Telecom and most of the telecommunications industry. I ordered an adsl line in November and the 60 days for activation now stretches to 90+ and still no sign of man and ladder. I connect using my mobile phone and try and run a fledgling web based business at 56kpbs. I ask you...
Life in Modica is all spills and thrills. I've spent an inordinate amount of time putting broken things into piles to be removed later. Bricks mainly, and stone. And gesso, intonaco, cement. The bizarre thing is having removed it all, I then replace it all on the wall..
I spent two days nurturing callouses revealing a stone arch in the bathroom of one of the flats I'm renovating. It's rather nice, and now I can sit on the loo and look at the side door of the cathedral and contemplate the inscription above it which reads Mater Ecclesia.. rather high brow toilet literature.
The only other literature I read of late is intructions on paint tins. It's all very different to the English variety which comes in a Dulux tin and is applied with aplomb. Here it's all indiluito and diluente, walls breathe you know. Unfortunately they also let in large amounts of water, hence the gesso and cement saga above.
However, the almond trees are in full blossom and all is well with the world now it's not raining continuously.

It's been a week. And to cap it all I had my first earthquake today. So did most of Greece, but I was in the Carrefour doing my shopping and things fell off shelves. Just thought I'd let you know that Im living on the front line here.
Apart from that, Ive been sandpapering for most of the week. Not my favourite job, in fact it's up there with ironing as things I would happily never do again in my life. But needs must. Adverts are running in papers and on the net and people are contacting me. it's all go. Trouble is, Italy is still on holiday. Well, it was Epiphany and the streets were filled with little children singing Christmas songs and reenacting the arrival of the Magi. Modica decided to have a notte bianca on 5th Jan. most cities do this in the summer, but not here. they chose the coldest night of the year for the shops to stay open and people to revel in the streets till 4am. It wouldn't happen in Stockport, but then I suppose it does on a Saturday night. the only difference between Stockport and Modica is the amount of vomit on the street the next morning.

New Year, new start....
2006 finds me in Sicily, a long way from Naples and from all that it had to offer. Now Im based in Siracusa, though am setting up a business in Modica, about 80 km away towards Ragusa. Why? Well, Modica is bloody lovely. Enchanting even. Ive been swept away by the light, the food, the kindness of the people and perhaps not least, the price of property.
I am now the owner of 4 houses and a warehouse in MOdica, and soon to add another, a piece of paradise in the countryside outside the town. And the reason for all this property investment? Well, Im joining a particular ratrace in the hope of making some money for myself and starting up a holiday lettings/(property management business. So far so good. Now comes the hard bit which involves paying lòarge sums of money to various newspapers to run adverts. God, it's expensive. Let's hope it pays dividends. At least I can make the website myself. And have done... hurry hurry to www.modicasa.com and see whats on offer in this part of the world.
Otherwise Ive spent my Christmas eating good food and stripping doors and windows. Next week sees painting, and water pipes.. it's all go. And the sales start on 6 January so Ill be out there buying all the furniture I can lay my hands on to furnish my holiday flats.
I don't know what will become of this blog. I hope it won't be an endless list of do's and don'ts for renovating houses, but you never know. At least before long I will have a fixed telephone line and connecting via my mob ile won't be such a chore. I will of course, keep you posted. Promise.

Lawks... nearly 4 months since I put digit to plastic and typed something here. Shameful. No excuses, I take the rap. From next week it's all change. Naples will be no more. I'm relocating to Sicily, to see whether life in the deep south will suit me dandy. And Im sure it will. I've spent all of the last four months there, and it now seems the natural progression. It's been a few weeks of luggin heavy boxes and items of furninture from pillar to post, and now finally into my tiny new flat. Now all I have to do is find somewhere to buy. More than one place to be exact, but more of that anon.
Of course I dont yet have a telephone. Telecom Italia make you wait for such things. So it may be some time before a regular blogging service resumes. Or it may not.... there - that'll keep you poppning back to see whats happening down on my particular farm.

The next news will surely be from deepest Sicily, so think on and look sharp.

I've been in Tuscany with my parents, and missed the most important day in
recent Neapolitan history. Maradona came to town! The entire city ground to
a halt while the once fat one went walkabout and visited the stadium. it's
the first time he's been back since he left in semi disgrace 15 years ago.
The Neapolitans didnt care though, he is semi divine for the people here.
Florence meanwhile was full of Americans. Moaning. Too many churches, too
many italians, not enough English being spoken, anything and everything
falling foul of the desires of the people of Kentucky. It was vile. Even
the oltrarno, the area south of the river and usually off the tourist
circuit is getting trippy. All the nice old workshops of the antique
restorers and shoemakers are being turned into designer boutiques and trendy
restaurants. Its a great shame, there will be soon nothing left for the
Fiorentini in the city.
Fortunately out at Le Cascine, the huge park to the west of the city, the
emphasis is still on Florentines, and they all come here at the weekends,
leaving the city centre to the hordes. I love this park. Down by the river
some jolly folk have made a beach, complete with paddling pool. All it
needs are some garden gnomes and it would be a dead cert for Ground Force.

In Lucca the Americans were absent, just lots of middle class English with
many blond tots in designer prams. Lucca is a beautiful place, and despite
the fact that there really isnt much to do, the days pass with ease. The
hostel there is one of the poshest Ive ever been in. Its in the old
convent/monastery of San Frediano, and is palatial. Fantastic showers,
bathrooms and comfortable beds. I'll go back.

I'm vexed. May of the Monuments came to a close today, and the final weekend promised the opening of the cemetery of 366 tombs... a remnant of the Borbonic era, finally used in the cholera epidemic of 1888. For weeks I have been asking various tourist offices where this cemetery is, no-one seems to know. But this morning, bright and early, I set off and walked to the where it was, under a flyover of the ring road.. finally directed by a binman and a hearse driver. Of course it was shut. A very nice man told me that although it had been advertsied in the official literature, in the papers last Thursday and this morning, nobody had had the presence of mind to get authorisation for the opening of what is basically private property. Hence, no cemetery and I had walked kilometres in broiling sun for no reason whatsoever.
What's worse, is that exactly the same thing happened last year with the cemetery at Fontanelle which was advertsied as being open, but eventually declared to be too dangerous to open to the public. Ho hum, .. next year perhaps.

Video mobile phones.. what are they all about? They are the latest thing to incense me. As the techonology is as far advanced as the early housebrick cellphones were in 1989, I really cant see the point of them at all, unless you work in the porn industry.
On the ferry back from Palermo, a bloke called his mate. At six in the morning they had a video conversation. It went like this...
Ciao
...ciao (actually the other person sounded like lkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkcccccccccccccsstkmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
Can you see Vesuvio?
kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
I cant hear you
kkkkkkkkkkkkkkk cccccccccccccccccccccc hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
I said can you see Vesuvio
kkkkkkkkkkk ssssssssssssssssssssss hggggnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnkl
we'll talk later
kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
I said we'll talk later
kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
What?
lkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
end of call
Now the technological problem here is a crap video camera housed in a small piece of plastic with equally naff speakers. Hence, the fact that to use the video you have to hold the phone at arms length, which means that to hear your caller the speakers have to be at top volume with all the resultant distortion. I cant believe the men at Motorola didnt latch on to that, or perhaps they were so keen to get the porn industry to buy in bulk the idea of holding anything at arms length carried them away. And to cap it all, everyone within earshot has to listen to your inane conversation in which you ask each other to repeat what the just said ad infinitum.
Much better would be a phone whihc when you held it at arms length squirted water in your face... and about as effective as video telefony.